| 2019 | 03 | 19 | busy bees and naughty trees

my name is sophielola.

i'm currently sitting at my desk staring into the remnants of my coffee, deliberating another. the conversations happening over the top of my head are ones I should probably listen to but i half don't want to switch my ears on.


mondays are normally bad days.

but sometimes they're just the worst.

sometimes we don't talk about it, but everyone dreads beginnings as much as they dread an ending.

i've just realised. at 0945. an ending is unavoidable.

i don't really understand.

i don't want to understand.

i just wanted reassurance. 
but that was never going to happen. 

so i'm taking back control

i'm going to say no.



bearing no likeness to that which i feel for
you fight for your right to keep thoughts deep inside
to hope and commitment and endless devotion
arms empty and open, dismissed and denied
tarnished and branded by shifting emotion
your artwork the marks in my heart and on my outside
tireless persistence and spiteful resistance
you leave me then plead me remain at your side

ripping and rending and sewing an ending
i sing to myself in a sorrowful key
abandoning fragments intended for mending
again i descend to the space, in between.