| 2016 | 04 | 10 | identity crisis |

I slept so well last night.

If you know me, you'll know that sleep isn't quite my forte, and I definitely don't get enough. Managed to get a solid 8 hours and feeling rested is kinda nice. My brain also feels like it's running at a strong 30% capacity - I'm not currently stumbling around like a drunk toddler.

It was after my first shift back at Claytons - which thankfully wasn't too busy. It was also the first shift for a friend of mine, who turned out to not be completely incapable. Even between for of us the cleanup only took an hour. Home by 4am.

I only got my bum slapped once as well.


working progress. 

This year all started with me losing my running watch. Not just any running watch - it had been through some of the toughest experiences of my life - including my first attempt at an ultra. It also sparked a spree of cleaning, tidying and clearing out that I will never be able to match. I kid you not, every single one of my possessions was disrupted, re-folded and repacked. It was exhausting.

I am now at the point where I need to re-halve all of my possessions - our house is really too small for the three of us and I really want to be ready to think about moving out.

My god. Me living by myself, now there's a thought. I'd finally be able to live out my passions (cooking and cleaning) and bake every week. I fancy moving to a city for a bit, I miss Newcastle a lot. Who knows. 

this week.

My 'before' post has been seen by a lot of people - sorry mum, and I don't really care. Up until the age of 7 I would get my belly out in public and be told off by various family members, apart from my Nan. She used to fully endorse my activities. I am amazed I don't have a better tan.

I also managed to answer a question my lecturer set me a good few years ago. 'What is the best feeling' (to which I refused to give him an answer because I said I hadn't found it yet. I'm so wild). I emailed my lecturer and he said that my grade of 80% was still applicable. So smart.

I miss my degree, where answers like this gave you grades. 

be more nice.
I think more people need think about the impact of their words.

Tuesday should be renamed shrewsbury.

Following a complete lack of sleep on Tuesday night,  my body finally informed me it was very sad and refused to let me keep my eyes open for more than around 10 minutes without an enforced power nap. It really dragged.

help me.
It has recently been brought to my attention that I have lost my ability to wave.

It's really becoming a crisis.

Whereas before, I could wave without thinking - every time I lift my hand above shoulder height, panic sets in. I tense, look around and debate how best to abort the activity.
For the past few weeks I've been trialling a few different types, and some are met with more enthusiasm than others.

This has been the morning activity for my colleagues - to absolutely rip my greeting to pieces. I've tried sneaking in, I've tried arriving before everyone else

Another technique - slam your hand in a door.

standard grown up attire no?
Being asked by an electrician if there were any adults in my house was magical. 

What else did I not do this week?

Probably everything.

Convinced dad that the chillis we had weren't at all spicy. He added around three to his dinner and soldiered through, tears and all. He's a true inspiration.

I would make an utterly abysmal secretary. Whenever the phone rings at work I'm always the last one to the party when trying to pick up because it takes me so long to disengage with whatever I was focused on and prepare to answer the phone. I think my colleagues think I'm trying to avoid it, but in reality I'm just too engrossed in whatever I was doing, and every time I pick the phone up all I hear is the dial tone. One day. But not today.

My hair is so dark. 

my 'run'

I tried, and made it to mile 8. Then I walked for a further 6 miles, and went off track getting thoroughly lost. 

i look like a chipmunk. not flattering at all.
Where could this be?

Nobody knows.

I will be putting pink in my hair ASAP. 

christina perri - burning gold 
eliza and the bear - it gets cold
j-man - we can dance now

| 2016 | 04 | 03 | week 14 |

I will be blogging again okay? My absence is more highlighted by the fact we're up to week 14 and I've got barely anything to show for it. This is probably because I haven't actually slept for the last 4 days. 

Monday was a day off, and was spent catching up. I read a huge chunk of Breakfast at Tiffany's (I need to read more) before a quick phonecall with Gill. Sometimes I spend all day getting stuff done and then it completely leaves my brainspace, so nothing to report. I bumped into a few of my 'brothers' - you know, the guys who have adopted me due to my inability to function.

Tuesday was a bit of a blur, I was kind of stressed and needed to just go lie down. My lunch break was a little strange - you had to be there, and the gym session in the evening didn't end quite as I planned it to, but luckily I have some amazing people who always know how to calm me down!

Wednesday was an early start for a Hospital appointment, which, as the theme of the week seemed to be going, wasn't quite as planned. Instead, headed off to a goat farm that had been spotted on the drive over...

We saw many animals and I spent a lot of time misidentifying them - which was probably quite annoying to the parents attempting to educate their small children. Yes that pig is a small breed of hippo. Deal with that when you get home.

this is actually a ferret but I spent the whole day calling it a meerkat. 
I felt like the master of all animals. The huge bag of feed that cost me £1 made me many friends under the age of 5 (I was throwing it at children and goats alike. no one was safe).

The below creature is what some have called a 'demi god' - nice to see and nice to touch. Rarely seen outside of it's pen... I don't know. It's an alpaca. They're balls of cotton wool on legs. It's also not a fan of me squealing in its face and being all 'I LOVE YOU COME HOME WITH ME I NEED YOU IN MY LIFE.' And they definitely don't fit in the boot.

Then this happened. A horse made me cry. Actually I think they're called ponies. The level of sass emanating off the smallest creature i've seen was so high that it brought tears of pride to my eyes. These tears then mingled with whatever makeup I was wearing and fell all over my face. Cue me needing to walk it off. 

We grabbed lunch and went for such a weird drive, popping into or near my old old house and scaring the neighbours.

My dad officially lost the plot that evening. I dunno. I was sitting around minding my own business and he started wandering around saying 'no thank you'. I think being in such a high pressure stressful job he needs to come home and vent. Namely by running round shouting 'beep beep'. Why not eh?

Thursday workday. Such fun again. My job is actually ridiculously varied and every day I want to simultaneously high five my boss and scream at him. I think that's how everyone feels though. I don't know why but for most of the afternoon I was giggling over something we can't talk about here, and when my creative director came over to chat about some serious photos I was borderline crying (yep back to this again). She was not so amused. She'll get there.  

I also could not walk at all. I looked like a slightly drunk child attempting to traverse the pavements. Luckily my walk is only 0.7 miles. Unfortunately, that's really too far.

Friday. Lets talk about Friday another day. Some day.

My 17 mile run yesterday was only topped by the stupid number of freckles I now have and the sunburn on my cheekbones. Actually this sunburn spread and has given me some lovely new tan lines. 


Well done me.

waking up from a nap with smudged make up and bedhair. winning. 
Saturday afternoon and evening was somewhat a blur - post opticians and hairdressers and dentists and wherever else my trip into town took me I found some friends and we consumed a lot of television. 

after hopping the fence and retrieving the spare key I then left said key in the door for around 5 hours. I am amazed we haven't been burgled yet.
Sunday afternoon we walked some dogs. It was nice. 

Cheeky little throwback.

I miss obstacle racing so much. I miss training for mud, wind, rain, tears, crying, screaming, shouting, arguing, carrying, burpees, climbing, falling, sliding, slipping, more mud, pain, bruises, cuts, fear, water, swimming, jumping... you name it, I've probably done it. Oh lets not forget the whiplash incident shall we?

throwback to when I had to run 20 km solo and get thoroughly stressed out by the whole occasion. 

My brain is melting sideways. I'll edit this later okay? Promise.