sophie didn't do anything at all.

Thursday, 21 September 2017

today. part 54

Today was hard. 

Today I packed up all my belongings, and left the little cottage on the hill. I know I've mentioned previously 'leaving', but this time, I stripped it bare. 

I'm gone. 

I have to go back at somepoint next week for a final few bits, but otherwise... it's not home anymore. 

It used to be. That's why this is so hard. 

Pathetically I had a little cry.

- - -

a very expensive situation.

My coach called me at work today. It's nice. 

Upcoming costs:
£600 - car insurance
£90 - VW roadside thing
£20 - road tax
£120 - gym fees


I think, unforunately. My overdraft is about to take a beating....

| 2017 | 09 | 21 | day 12 |

well log out then?

the 1812 overture

Debuting in Moscow, 1882, it covers the war, depicting pieces of the French national anthem against Russian folk melodies. These two themes go back and forth - climaxing at the Battle of Borodino and the five cannon blasts. The success of the Russians is then bellowed out across the whole orchestra with a pretty epic rendition of O Lord, Save Thy People with some random bell ringing and more cannons. 

It's just a bit noisy and messy. and bangy. 

It's also massively mocked by musicians and conductors alike for its poor positioning in history and even the inability to properly time the cannons with the score. 

vulgar. listen though. you might learn a thing. 

Okay back to the swan.


Friday, 15 September 2017

| the chronicles of jerry | part 1

My dad.

My dad is a unique specimen.

He's short, bald and rotund.

He has his quirks. He likes things just so. 

He's eaten toast for breakfast since he was 2 and a half. 

Every single outfit consists of a collared top. 

But this is the story of The Royal Albert Hall.

- - -

He was a little excited you see, my dad, because there was a concert in that fairly famous location. His youngest daughter was playing the bassoon, the other... was supposed to be playing the cello.  

She hadn't actually been paying any attention at rehearsals and still wasn't sure of the performance piece. Or where she was sitting. Or anything really. 

But that was okay. You can't really see in the recording where she drops her bow and kind of just sits there. 

During the interlude. Jerry wanted a 'splore. 'Splorin is a mitchell thing, passed down the generations. I can train you. 

- - -

Up the steppy steps we went, and he got more and more excited. You see, he knew where we were going. He knew we'd get kicked out by security. But he didn't care.

We went round the back of the boxes, sneakily passing those with staff outside. 

We kept walking, and he kept hushing. 

'HERE'. He didn't yell.

He kind of jogged into the box, and started moving the chairs. 

'Dad! Dad! What are you doing?!'

I could hear people outside. 

Jerry started to hum too, and I had no idea what was going on.

He turned, gasped and giggled.

'Yes! The Queen has been here too!'

He then sat on all the chairs. 

And ran around in the corners. 

'Dad what the bloody hell are you doing?!'

'Excuse me sir. I'm going to have to ask you leave'

We both shouted it at the same time. Me. And the man wearing a security badge. 

My dad has never looked so pleased with himself. We were taken down to reception.

He finally whispered. 

'That. Was the royal box. We practically stood with royalty. '

Half an hour of explaining ourselves so my dad could rearrange the furniture and stand where a small lady sometimes stands. 

Thanks dad. 


Saturday, 9 September 2017

| 2017 | 09 | 10 | day 10 |

I tell people I'm a vegetarian because in actual fact I just don't like most peoples cooking.

- - -

Road trips are not complete without jelly babies. 

We did this to a lot more conkers than probably necessary. 

They're now out in the world giving squirrels ink poisoning. 

Or the elderly a heart attack.

Managed to get a second place at the Hasler.

I have to say it was one of my tougher races. 

My race tactics were definitely tested and luckily I pay a lot of attention to what the more experienced paddlers around me say.

More than once I managed to cut people off and drop them, using our fairly quick portaging to full effect. 

It was a bit daunting looking over our shoulders to see the five or so boats hanging on, but eventually we dropped them at a turn and they couldn't climb back up. 

The wind really picked up during the later stage, heading upstream into a nasty head wind hurts the arms. 

that evening, we were in an empty cinema to watch the hitman's armpit. or whatever it's called. 

Has that guy everyone fancies. 

I don't get how cars in films can deal with so much during a chase -  but my little Up gets destroyed by a pot hole. 

Or a puddle. 


Friday, 8 September 2017

| 2017 | 09 | 08 | day 8 |

It's funny, isn't it, when something is over.

A feeling of.... weightlessness. 

Whether it be a job, a dream, a relationship, some kind of hell or simply just a chore. There's a moment of release when it's done.

Today, I received a different kind of confirmation. One that has been a long time coming.


- - -

Ode to a lost sock.


Kayak salad, Alaska yak

Meg, am I naive? No, yaw a kayak on Evian, I'm a gem

These are actually backwards.

- - -

we mispelled compitition. 

It's okay. It was no biggy. BIG E.

i am on it today. 

- - -


Thursday, 7 September 2017

| 2017 | 09 | 07 | day 7 |

This made me laugh for far too long today. 

we were crying and trying to have a serious conversation with our boss. 

professionalism 101. 

is all.

- - -

I still have these in a pocket.


Wednesday, 6 September 2017

| 2017 | 09 | 06 | DAY 6 |

update:: I'm now almost 100% certain the strawberry plants are tomato plants. (tomatoe, tomator, tamata). So... kinda changes my jam plans

- - -

I am regularly reminded of on particular car journey, during which I reversed back off of a junction (almost hitting the car behind) at which point my passenger calmly/fearfully yelled 'NO SOPHIE'. 

Moments later I was taking us through a narrow gap (another car had also decided they wanted to come from the other direction) so I started yelling I AM PUSHING. This is not the correct way to handle your vehicle.

Less yelling more controlled and careful decisions.

- - -

How was my evening off?

thank you for asking.

Well. I cooked dinner. You know. The usual.

the best potato wedges around.

This is a copy of the carmen manuscript. I'm sorry to say it won't look like that for long.

noisy toy practice all night long.

I will be proficient one day. 

Tuesday, 5 September 2017

| EMPTIES | 2017 | 09 | reviews |

John Frieda | sheer blonde go blonder shampoo | 500ml [£9.99, Boots]
Claiming to lighten hair without drying it out - it kind of did the opposite. 
Bleached hair is really difficult on a good day, but when a product completely strips the moisture out of it and leaves you with straw then you have to work twice as hard to get the moisture back in. 
Having had blonde hair now for over ten years I would consider myself a bit of an expert when it comes to maintenance products - and this is not one of the ones I would reach for again. 

Would not recommend. 

Pro:voke | touch of silver conditioner | 200ml [£2.19, Boots]
In contrast with the above, I love the Pro:voke range. Genuinely. 
The purple pigment is strong enough that you run a risk of slightly grey hair - which for me is ideal. It completely strips the brassiness from your locks and doesn't take out too much moisture. 

Would recommend. 

Superdrug | Pick & Mix Rose [£3.29, Superdrug]
I'm loathe to say I liked this because semi permanent hair colour is something I'm not too bothered about. It's there and then it's not. 
In all honesty I would stick to buying something far more pigmented and dilute it in your conditioner. That way you'll get a better quality colour. 

Eesh. No. Would not recommend. 


Rimmel | BB Cream Matte [£6.99, Boots]
I was not blown away by this. It's cheap face gunk that's probably doing more harm than good. 

Nah. Would not recommend. 

Maybelline | Baby Skin Primer [£7.99, Boots]
I'm only going to recommend this primer because of the way it actually improves the facial region.

Would recommend. 

Wunderbow | Brow Gel [£19.95, Boots]
Yep. You need this. 

Would recommend. 
Maybelline | Lash-sensational Mascara [£8.99, Boots]
Best mascara I own. 
Lasts forever too. 

Eye of Horus | Goddess Mascara [£16.50, Beauty Bay]
Not going into it. Just don't bother. 


Colgate | Max White One [£4.00, Boots]

Cleans teeth.

I would recommend using toothpaste. 

The Body Shop | Hemp Face Protector [£8.50, The Body Shop]
Body shop, no. This was not what I had hoped it would be. 
I'm disappointed in myself for falling for their marketing, and looking at the ingredients who knows what I was on when I purchased said product. Ew. You'd be better off with olive oil. Hah.


The Body Shop | Shea Body Butter | 400ml [£15.00, The Body Shop*]
These are such cult products. So many people rave about them. But why? Probably because they're jumping on the band wagon. Or because they don't know what good moisturiser feels like on their skin. The Body Shop has definitely lost a lot of my respect. I'm sorry.

Either way, I'm doing it. I'm going to say please don't buy this. Even Palmer's cocoa body butter is significantly better. 

Would not recommend. 


Saturday, 2 September 2017

| 2017 | 09 | 01 | day 1 |

Okay so this post is technically 2 months late. Sorry.

I had envisioned that following my 25th I would  be overwhelmed by the urge to blog again and that I would leap in with the same enthusiasm I do with the Thames. 

Not so. 

ukulele:: I've had it two weeks now and I'm still not very good... weirdly. New skills are both frustrating and exciting. I get really impatient. Then I remember how long it took for me to hit high g with singing and so.. breathe. 

life skills:: did you know that budgets aren't as scary as you thought they were? I've made myself a cheeky little excel document that I update every day when I get home and this will hopefully sort me out. *bangs head on desk*

reviews:: this blog was built off of the back of a series of beauty and  obstacle race reviews (yeah totally linked) and I'm sorry to say it is unlikely they will be returning in the same quantity. I just don't buy as much anymore. Nor do I risk my limbs throwing myself around some of those crazy courses. 

hair:: one of my best friends seems to think blonde looks best. so... as if I needed an excuse!


Friday, 1 September 2017

| empties | 2017 | 09 |

So here I am again, back to collecting my rubbish...

John Frieda | sheer blonde go blonder shampoo | 500ml [£9.99, Boots]
Pro:voke | touch of silver conditioner | 200ml [£2.19, Boots]
Superdrug | Pick & Mix Rose [£3.29, Superdrug]


Rimmel | BB Cream Matte [£6.99, Boots]
Maybelline | Baby Skin Primer [£7.99, Boots]
Wunderbow | Brow Gel [£19.95, Boots]
Maybelline | Lash-sensational Mascara [£8.99, Boots]
Eye of Horus | Goddess Mascara [£16.50, Beauty Bay]


Colgate | Max White One [£4.00, Boots]
The Body Shop | Hemp Face Protector [£8.50, The Body Shop]
The Body Shop | Shea Body Butter | 400ml [£15.00, The Body Shop*]


*This is for a 200ml tub as they don't seem to do the 400ml anymore. 

That is utterly shocking.

As in.

I used up over £100 of products this month and didn't really clock it. Thankfully, none of these need replacing (I either didn't like them, don't use them, or have alternatives) and if I could go back and not buy them in the first place I would. 

I would only recommend two of those (the Pro:voke conditioner and the Wunderbrow Eyebrow gel) but otherwise, none of them were worth the spend. 

This has been eye opening...


Friday, 18 August 2017

| life fail | bus w*nker | bring it back | 2014

This story. I still can't even.

2014. The year I was a builder. 

- - -

I've been having rough luck lately. My usual level of clumsiness,  propensity for ridiculous situations and general inability to function in public have all spiralled out of control and I seem to be walking into far more malfunctions than fair. 

Take last week. I've been working from a not so close location and the bus has become a must (the 800 at 7:54am to be precise). Ordinarily I can manage with not many hours of sleep, but on this particular Thursday, my 6 hours were not enough. Even as I sat at the bus stop (a sorry sight), my head was nodding forwards and I could barely keep my eyes open. 

The fight to remain conscious took an aggressive turn minutes away from my destination. I was quite literally holding my eyes open and biting my cheek to stay focused, but even that wasn't holding back the waves of sleep. The inevitable happened. I gave in. Setting an alarm for five minutes time and putting my headphones in I leant forwards and allowed my body to shut down. 

Twenty minutes later.

I was awoken by a pain in my face. Specifically from contact with the head of the man in front of me. A groggy sense of realisation hit me as I fell sideways, completely out of control of my limbs. Landing awkwardly in the aisle, my momentum wasn't done with me yet, and I rolled down the small number of steps - an audience of twenty doing their best to hide bemusement and bewilderment as a twenty something squirmed on the floor. 

Nothing made sense, other than the fact I definitely wasn't in control of this situation. Hurrying to stand and retain any sort of dignity (my skirt had somehow made it's way to my boobs and I was definitely giving everyone an eyeful) I then looked out of the window. I had missed my stop. First thing first, my hurried and babbled apology to the middle aged man clutching the back of his head before, I ran to the driver.

'Please let me off. I'm so late for work'. In what I realised was a rare case of sympathy, he stopped at the next bus stop, his words ringing in my ears as I ran on.

'Maybe next time don't party so hard.'

They all thought I was drunk. If only that were the case. 

I can't even imagine how much the man who had had the misfortune of sitting in front of me would have hated his day. I hit him with some force. 

This is the real reason why I run - I still had a mile to cover before I was back at the right stop.


| fitness | my stupidest injury | 2016 the year I got muddy

I have more than one. fyi.

The below photo is a still taken from GoPro footage of my finish.

And it hurt.

A lot.

In fact, it was one of the single most painful experiences of my life, before it went completely numb straight after.

That should have signalled that there was some damage done.

My mum (ex-nurse) was in a panic for the rest of the day - we had opted out of running the 5 miler because we were scared I had broken something. 

I insisted on completing the 10 mile race on the Sunday (I was writing a review for the magazine), which turned out to be 15. It was excruciating. I was unable to turn my head, and climbing obstacles jolted my whole body.  


Monday, 14 August 2017


My dissertation...

'How is Snapchat an agent of the attention economy of new media?'

...brought to life some uncomfortable truths surrounding how apps are designed to dictate our usage behaviour. I kind of glossed over them at the time, focusing more on sexting (as my pornography paper had  been banned by the ethics committee and I was mad).

However this article is why I'm going to be quitting my job soon.

I can't do it anymore.

Phone addiction is pivoted as the fault of the individual, rather than the apps we use.

It's recommended that unless you're talking to a person, you should reduce the notifications you're exposed to (insta, facebook etc). 

- - -

the above photo makes me so happy. 

because even in the middle of the session from hell, I still look like I'm enjoying myself. And what would be the point if i wasn't?

this weekend was tough from a training point of view and today my everything aches.

not sorry.

yeah... i think i was being told off too


Wednesday, 2 August 2017

| 2017 | august | 02 | wednesday

This is my sigh sheet. 

I was allocated 169 sighs (given my propensity for an exhale in all situations). I'm at the 100 to go mark. 

It's getting tense. 

- - - 

Birthday was good.

I made myself some goals over the coming year

- save £10,000. I know. That's a big ask given my financial management but I'm determined. 
- focus. I need to establish a routine and get back on track 
- - -

I have no voice at the moment following a loud shouty game. It was magical. 

I had my hair dyed even blonder. I'm not sure where I'll stop. 

This weekend was also overshadowed by the national championships. 

My lot did quite well actually. 

Little bit proud. 

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