sophie didn't do anything at all.

Tuesday, 13 May 2014

/ life fail / what happens in Waitrose

This isn't entirely a fail, however it's just another of the wonderful situations I've been in.

I am notorious for food. I like it a lot. You can probably work that out from my body shape.

My pass time during sixth form was supermarket browsing.

I genuinely used to spend around half an hour a day scouring the shelves, seeking out fun foods and putting together hypothetical shopping lists.



Now that I'm an adult, I actually buy things from said supermarkets, and enjoy the mature feeling of spending money on things that will last less than 30 seconds. lol.

Lets set the scene. I'd woken up early, scraped my hair into a rough bun and thrown on a thin layer of foundation, bronzer and some lip stain (oh, and my eyebrows). A quick walk preceded my gym trip, after which I took a stroll around town, buying both a diffuser and some new socks. Oh the high life.

It struck me that my post workout meal options were limited, so I headed up towards Waitrose.

At this time in the morning, the shop was fairly empty. This is the best time for it - to spend at least twenty minutes reading the ingredients of all the yoghurts to decide on the best health to flavour ratio. Oh. Such fun.

I walked past the bread, narrowly avoiding falling onto a little old lady who too appeared to be weighing up her options (soda bread vs rye, naturally). I can't handle corners well. She half turned, acknowledging the disheveled female stumbling past, before returning to her decision. That was fine.

I chose full fat greek, in case you wondered.

Requiring some blueberries, I mooched, paying close attention to the 100g/£ options to ensure I got my moneys worth of fruit. The little old lady who had narrowly avoided being crushed joined me by the berries. I smiled at her, before getting back to squinting at packaging.

She moved closer, and I attempted to avoid making eye contact. Futile.

'Excuse me.'

Smiling, I nodded.

'I don't really know how to put this. But you dear, you quite simply have the nicest lips I have ever seen.'

'Uh, thanks.'

'In fact, they look so good you just want to touch them.'

'Right. Yes, I see.'

'It's a good thing, dear, very much so.'

Having never been confronted by such a situation, I kind of did the sensible thing and legged it.

I just don't understand.

Really, I don't.

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